Are you tired of dealing with your friend's on-again-off-again relationship?

Our life is no less than a roller-coaster ride filled with ups and downs. And if handling that was tough, dealing with your friends' on-again-off-again relationship can be extremely frustrating, not to mention it affects your emotional well-being. Being there for them in their bad times is one thing, but there comes a point where you have to draw boundaries and acknowledge just how much drama you can handle. 

You must find a way out before you get pulled too deep into their relationship drama and these are the tell-tale signs to look out for. 

 

You're emotionally exhausted

If every hangout with them leaves you feeling mentally and emotionally drained, it's a red flag. When their relationship problems become the topic of every discussion, you will start to feel like their problems have now become your problems. You wish they could, just for once, make a decision—either stay with them or break up—instead of keeping you in limbo. This constant on-off behaviour will lead to you being always overwhelmed with new, but repeated, behaviour and information.

Your interest starts to fade

You might have been a good listener in the beginning, however, you will gradually start to be less engaged, disinterested, or zone out when they’re talking to you. That never-ending cycle of breakups and makeups will see you switch off, and every time they talk about their partner, you end up rolling your eyes—because you know exactly how it’s going to end.

You're losing patience 

Hearing the same stories and complaints over again—breaking up, getting back together—can be frustrating, especially when they never take the advice you offer. And with every new episode, your tolerance levels for their drama reduces. It’s hard to feel supportive when it seems like nothing has changed. You no longer want to listen to the same stories or complaints all over again. 

You start avoiding them

Out of sight is out of mind. You start to make plans that don’t involve them, just to get a break from the drama. Your time is precious, and you need to spend it with people who make things better, not worse. 

You keep repeating yourself

It’s not just their behaviour that’s repeated, but your advice as well. The problem is that they listen only to themselves, and watching them make the same mistakes—doing the opposite of what you advised—can be hurtful as you start to feel like your input isn’t valued. 

Feeling the need to set boundaries

You feel the need to tell your friends you’re not comfortable discussing their relationship issues anymore. Prioritising your own mental and emotional well-being makes room for healthier conversation and friendships that are more fulfilling. 

Concerned for their well-being and yours

You might be tired of their drama and bad decisions, but they’re your friend at the end of the day. Watching them worry is going to add to your stress so be sure to set boundaries. And if their ongoing drama makes you not want to spend time with them or be less excited to see them, then it's time ot take care of yourself first. 

If you see these things happening to you, it’s time to breathe, take a step back and evaluate whether this is a friendship you want to be in. 

Lead image: Netflix

Also read: Why do we soft-launch our partners on social media but hard-delete them after a breakup?

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