How to announce your breakup on social media the right way

We’re suckers for all things romance, especially one that transcends global and cultural boundaries. And that’s why it shatters our hearts when some love stories end without a happily ever after. Like the popular Indo-Pak queer couple, social media influencers Anjali Chakra and Sufi Malik, who called off their relationship. Chakra, an event planner, and Malik, an artist and teacher, first crossed paths on Tumblr and officially started dating seven years later in 2018; Chakra took the first step by messaging Malik about her experiences as a queer South Asian woman.

The couple were engaged to be married. However, fans of the couple got a massive blowdown with the news of their wedding being called off on their respective Instagram accounts; Malik went a step further to reveal the reason—she cheated on Chakra weeks before the wedding. 

Chakra’s message was poised and graceful. She said, “This may come as a shock, but our journey is shifting. We have decided to call off our wedding and end our relationship due to infidelity committed by Sufi.” Despite the heartbreak, she urged her followers to show “absolutely no negativity” towards her partner.

Malik, on the other hand, took ownership of her mistake of cheating on her fiancée (the duo got engaged in 2022; Chakra called it the “easiest yes” of her life.) just weeks before their planned wedding.

Reading both Chakra and Malik’s messages got us thinking about how one should go about breakup announcements on social media. You could certainly choose to keep things private, but if you’ve shared your relationship journey with your friends and followers through lovey-dovey posts on social media (even more so if you’re a public figure), sharing your breakup news should be the next right step.

So how should one go about it?

Do not rush into announcing the breakup

Breakups are always hard to take on the chin. Instead of breaking the news immediately, use that time to reflect on what happened and take time to process your emotions. This quiet period is essential for your mental health and peace of mind. Don’t be itching to let the world know you’re single the moment it happens. You should also try and find the answer to ‘why are you posting’ in this time of self-reflection. Do you come from a place of negativity with the intent of hurting your former partner? If the sole intention is to let people know that you’ve broken up and are now single, be quick about it. But if you’re not in the right headspace, it’s best to wait things out. 

There may be a small chance that you get back together. In that case, you don’t want to break up, tell everyone on social media, and then get back together (don’t be that couple please!). No one has the time to keep up with your constant breakups and patch-ups. It’s best not to confuse your friends and followers. 

Think about how your relationship looked on social media

If you were that couple who always posted about your relationship, there’s no way people aren’t going to notice when you stop posting about your partner. Of course, no one is going to ask you about what happened (possibly), but they’re surely going to be curious. If you find yourself in this conundrum, it’s best to inform them using the same social media platform. How detailed you want to keep it is a matter of personal choice. 

In order to avoid gossip and wild assumptions, be sure to let your followers know that your first explanation is the only one. Being open and honest with the announcement enables your loved ones to reach out to you, making sure that you’re not suffering by yourself. 

Keep things respectful, and don’t trash-talk

No matter how badly you’ve been hurt, there is no upside to criticising your ex and/or your relationship. Instead of feeling resentful and vindictive, learn to accept, forgive, and adapt. Resist the temptation to tell your side of the story (a move that could backfire if there are people who know the exact details of how things ended) and focus on sharing a positive message about your breakup that promotes self-love.

Lead photo credit: Netflix

Also read: The power of silence after a break-up

Also read: Why do we hold on to the messages, photos and gifts from our exes?