Is taking a break from your relationship healthy?

You may love your partner to bits and still feel the need to get some space to work on yourself or address certain issues that cause anxiety in your relationship. This is when you sit down and have an honest conversation with your loved one about taking a break. Remember, taking a break doesn’t mean that you’re breaking up; it simply means pressing pause on the relationship for a while. Taking a step back can often help you move forward in your relationship, and getting the time and space to see your bond with your boo from a different perspective is never a bad thing. 

It’s crucial to remember that the impact of a break depends on what you’re seeking out of it. Using this time to reflect on yourself and the areas of improvement in your relationship can make the break healthy and effective. Here are a couple of reasons why taking a break in your relationship can actually be a good thing.

First, here's why you should consider taking a break. 

 

You take a break for the right reasons

Taking a break can be a good thing if both partners have the right motivations and are looking at it as an opportunity to grow, get some much-needed clarity, and then get back together. What makes it unhealthy is if one or both partners choose to ignore a long-standing problem or engage in infidelity. That said, one’s partner, in some cases, might not be the reason for them wanting to take a break. They may have to travel, be tied up in work or educational commitments, or take care of a sick parent who will take more of their time and attention, etc. The important change is that taking a break will alter your daily routine as a couple.

Taking a break at the right time

Infidelity or a lack of surety about the relationship could also be a good reason to take a break as it lets you take a step back and reflect on things. Your feelings and emotions are intense at that time, and the distance puts you in a headspace to reflect on what’s right, what is wrong, and the changes that need to be made. 

Right person, but not the right place

You may also consider taking a break if you feel that you are not in the right place in your life to commit to a relationship. Maybe you are not where you want to be in your career or you want to move out of your parent’s home. Taking a break can give you the time and clarity to figure these things out. 

You get to know if you can be alone

You might be in a relationship because you’re scared of being alone; you just don’t know what your life would be like without them. Taking a break can help you question whether you love the person you’re with or if you’re simply with them because it’s better than being alone. Finding the answer to this is important for your mental well-being, whether you choose to stay together or not.

You’re not sure about them/not on the same page

If you’re not feeling the good vibes with your partner, taking a break allows you to think about what you truly want from the relationship and whether you want to continue in it. Being aligned with your partner on goals and values—in terms of lifestyle, career goals, or planning a future together—can make or break a relationship. Yes, compromise is key in any relationship, but how much are you willing to give and take? Don’t compromise to the point where you end up resenting both your partner and yourself for the choices you made to stay in the relationship. 

From the why, here’s how taking a break becomes healthy

 

It’s good and healthy when you put in the work

Don't take a break unless you're committed to working on the relationship—otherwise, it may fizzle out, leading to a gradual loss of love. A break can be healthy when you've discussed the reasons with your partner and outlined what changes you both expect after it ends. It's essential to agree on timelines—how long the break will last, what to do if either of you needs more time, and to establish clear ground rules. This includes whether you're allowed to see other people, how often you'll communicate, and whether checking in on each other is allowed or if complete no-contact is the rule. Having this conversation to set expectations is crucial.

Taking a break is beneficial if you take time out for yourself and spend time in self-reflection

Spend that time journaling your feelings or seeking professional help to talk through your emotions. As you reflect, consider the things you may have taken for granted or failed to appreciate. This is important because, in that headspace, it’s easy to focus only on the negatives. At the same time, if your emotions are particularly intense, you can dig deeper to uncover the root cause of your anger. Understanding this allows you to address the issue, opening up opportunities for growth and positive change.

Relationships thrive on mutual accountability, and regularly checking in with your partner—say, once a week—is a great way to keep the lines of communication open. These check-ins provide an opportunity to discuss your progress and reflections. Moreover, they serve as a valuable gauge to determine if you or your partner are ready to end the break and move forward together.

Things don’t just end here; you both need to come back together and decide whether to continue the relationship or part ways. If reaching a conclusion feels difficult, couples therapy can provide valuable clarity about your situation and the dynamic you share. The answers you find might not be what you wanted or expected, but they will ultimately be what’s best for you both.

Lead image: Netflix

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