What's the difference between exclusive dating and a monogamous relationship?

In the ever-evolving modern dating world, where understanding all the new relationship terms has become more complicated than actually being in a relationship, the distinctions between ‘Exclusive Dating’ and ‘Monogamous Relationship’ are more crucial than ever. While it’s good that the youth has coined terms for every nuanced stage of a relationship, at times it can be overwhelming. More often, the terms ‘Exclusive Dating’ and ‘Monogamous Relationship’ may seem interchangeable but they encapsulate different phases of romantic involvement. 

Let’s understand these terms in more detail and find out the differences between them.

What is Exclusive Dating?
'Exclusive Dating' simply means you’re actively involved with someone, possibly in the ‘getting-to-know-them’ phase, with the understanding that you’re not exploring other options. It serves as a trial period before making the big transition from casual dating to a committed relationship. One can say it’s the stage just prior to entering into a monogamous relationship, where you both decide to exclusively devote your energy to get a better understanding of each other.

How is it different from a Monogamous Relationship?
A 'Monogamous Relationship' is a stage where both you and your significant other are fully committed to a long-term journey together. It’s a more serious stage of a relationship where you and your partner discuss shared aspirations, such as career goals, family, marriage etc, basically anything that requires a partnership and mutual planning.

Now that we know what exactly both the terms mean, let’s take a look at how exclusive dating is different than a monogamous relationship.

There is no long-term commitment involved in 'Exclusive Dating'. Whereas, a 'Monogamous Relationship' is based on a strong commitment with a shared vision of the future.

While dating exclusively, the official status of you being a couple may or may not be established. However, in a 'Monogamous Relationship', you’re considered and recognised as each other's plus one.

'Exclusive Dating' might involve a degree of uncertainty when it comes to emotional connection as the couple is still navigating the depths of the relationship. On the contrary, couples in a 'Monogamous Relationship' tend to be more open and transparent when it comes to sharing emotions, feelings, and vulnerabilities.

'Exclusive Dating' mainly focuses on living in the present without making extensive plans for the future of the relationship. A 'Monogamous Relationship', on the other hand, is all about envisioning the future together as a committed couple.

The level of expectations vary in 'Exclusive Dating' and 'Monogamous Relationship', with the latter typically involving higher and more defined expectations.

Why do people choose to exclusively date before getting into a monogamous relationship?

They’re not ready for a relationship 
The most common reason why people prefer exclusive dating is that they want companionship but they’re not fully prepared for a committed relationship as yet. This doesn’t necessarily indicate commitment issues; rather, it could mean they’re trying to get a better understanding of their partner before diving into something more serious. 

They want to check the compatibility
Many individuals may share a great chemistry with someone they are attracted to and start dating only to discover later that they aren’t compatible with each other. Determining compatibility is a gradual process and 'Exclusive Dating' offers the time to know each other better and check the compatibility levels before forming a strong and lasting relationship.

They have commitment issues
Commitment phobia is the most common issue faced by many individuals, particularly the younger generation. People with commitment issues might find it difficult to make things official with the one they’re dating and would like to take things slow. These people often prefer exclusive dating as it gives them ample time to navigate their feelings and understand relationship dynamics before making things official.

They want to test the waters
Some people might wish to get a clear understanding of the dynamics within the relationship before fully committing. Exclusive dating allows this space to them where they can assess the potential of their relationship and how it might evolve in the future.

How long should you exclusively date before getting into a monogamous relationship?

The timing for transitioning from 'Exclusive Dating' to a 'Monogamous Relationship' isn’t fixed; it totally depends on the couple’s comfort and what feels right to them. Most couples sense the right moment for this shift as they start observing certain signs. These signs may include growing emotional intimacy, where both partners become more open and transparent, leading to a sense of ease and comfort around each other, and an increased ability to navigate minor differences without jeopardising the relationship.

If you believe you’re ready for the significant step of a committed relationship, it’s best to have an open and honest conversation with your partner which will help you understand whether you both are on the same page. And even if they’re not, try to be respectful of their decision and choices. Give them some time to navigate their feelings, and in the meantime, focus on enjoying the present. After all, 'Exclusive Dating' is all about cherishing the moment!