Sex toys and multiple orgasms—here’s everything you need to know

I grew up watching Sex and The City, and Carrie Bradshaw’s column—which reflected various aspects of life and relationships—seemed inspiring to me. Just like Bradshaw, I feel deeply about things and ponder on so many things that make life. I had a natural inclination towards writing about sex and relationships because these parts of our lives have a profound impact on our well-being. But it was only a few years ago, in the wisest phase of my late ’20s, that I started becoming more sexually empowered. I learnt more about my body, what pleases me, and just how amazingly orgasmic orgasms are!

Despite this, I hadn't really tried sex toys yet. They can seem terrifying to a sex toy virgin—all those ads showing a penis-like structure vibrating, making you wonder if putting it in you is such a good idea. I mean no real human has naturally vibrating body parts and, if you haven’t used a sex toy before, the idea of something convulsing in your vagina can scare you. But then there was Jane Sloan and Sutton Brady (The Bold Type) who had their own go-to sex toys. They were so unabashed about these that it felt like they were talking about their toothbrushes.

I was convinced, I had to give sex toys a shot—it was part of my journey to sexual maturity and freedom, and a hell lot of pleasure. (If Jane Sloan and Sutton Brady can do it, so can I!) In May 2023, I got my first little instrument of external stimulation that wasn't attached to a real person.

Just to make the debut a little more dramatic, I did myself on International Masturbation Day. It was a Sunday, and there were no libido-killing emails, meetings, and deadlines, giving me a perfect afternoon for going inward. I didn’t know what it would feel like, although the reactions of the many women using these made me anticipate an orgasm so good that you have to feel it to know it.

The first sex toy that I used was MyMuse’s Breeze Suction Massager. It looks non-threatening and unassuming and yet is powerful. When I was selecting my debut vibrator, I wanted something that can offer external stimulation because I intended to make every single nerve ending of my clit throb with pleasure. This one came with 10 different speed settings and I explored each one of them!

What worked for me was its suction technology, which leaves you with toe-curling orgasms every time.

A few months later...

Before I even got my hands on my very first sex toy, I knew I was a suction girl. During the many brass-necked conversations, my girlfriends and I had, any mention of the suction toys was preceded by moans of reminiscence and gratification. I wanted to explore these further but I also kept my mind open to other kinds of sex toys.

The next addition to my collection was the MsChief Virtuoso Vibrator with Air-Pulse Stimulator. Using it felt like I was ready to try more, as it came with a plethora of settings, both in terms of modes and frequencies. The air pulse creates an effect of suction around your clit (pro tip: you can also place it on your nips). What’s best is the other end of it can be used as an internal vibrator.

I simply place the suction toys on my happy button and do subtle kegel-type movements to remain hands-free while at it. The thing is, when the orgasm is not there yet, the different modes feel mild enough. But the moment the big O comes up, you begin to feel the sensations more profoundly. And before you know it, you’re struggling to control your moans, keeping them from reaching decibels similar to that of a blender.

Another suction toy that I tried and loved is the MsChief Solo. The bunny toy looks absolutely cute and comes with 10 different settings too. With more than one sex toy, I had an idea...

Multi-sensations for bigger Os

When you have both internal and external stimulators, why settle for just one type of orgasm? A blended orgasm is when you have two different ones happening together like one big O! So shooting for the stars, I decided to use two sex toys simultaneously—the Virtuoso as the internal one and Solo on the clit. Not every woman is able to get a vaginal orgasm but the sensations will offer you immense pleasure nonetheless, making your climax highly satisfying. At least it did for me!

While we are talking about mixing internal and external stimulations, I tried a sex toy that does both. The JOI Rotating Head G-spot Vibrator & Clit Licker, available on Love Depot (you can thank me later). It has a little tongue-like structure too (yes, you read it right). The sex toy is curved, to allow one end to be inserted inside your vagina, and the other to be licking your clit.

There is too much pleasure packed into one toy—the girth and the length. It is perfect for someone who likes theirs well-endowed. I was almost sore (but not sorry) the next day!

What worked for me

I did try out other sex toys. However, what really worked for me was the suction technology. Be it MsChief Solo, MyMuse’s Breeze Suction Massager, or MsChief Virtuoso Vibrator with Air-Pulse Stimulator, I know that when I'm in a good mood, an orgasm is almost guaranteed. These have you by the clit and we all know how powerful that is. You can also use these in partnered play.

Having said that, every person experiences pleasure differently. You must go and find your go-to companion for some “me time”. What matters is that you sexually empower yourself to experience orgasms that are bold—and then pass the fearlessness on to someone who needs it!

Also read: Zodiac signs that are the kinkiest in bed

Also read: Signs you and your partner are sexually compatible