Is mindfulness the key to mindblowing sex?

No matter what you’ve read on social media, mindfulness is not a tool. It’s a full-blown lifestyle that teaches us how to unlearn the chaotic multitasker mentality that was drilled into us. Being mindful makes us calmer, happier and healthier. And we should mention— sexually satiated. Mindfulness has its benefits on the streets as well as in the sheets. It’s all about tuning into your senses (or just one sense) and not letting your mind wander while you explore your partner.

Sex should not feel like a chore. Something that you do from muscle memory without actually enjoying it. And being mindful avoids that. If you are in the moment and fully in the zone it makes the act more intimate and less monotonous or mechanical. Read on to know how you can being mindful can enhance the way you feel pleasure, not just with a partner but by yourself too!

Curb the voices in your head

Do you remember the time you and your partner were like a wildfire? You’ll couldn't keep your hands off each other. Every touch and every kiss would drive you’ll into a lust frenzy. Unfortunately, that phase is just a distant memory in some long-term relationships. Sometimes, if you’ve been with someone for a while, it can take some time to get in the mood. Your mind is constantly wandering— did I switch off the light? Are the kids asleep? How am I going to complete my assignment? The thoughts in your head take over while you’re trying very hard to get to the sexy parts of the night. 

This is where mindfulness comes to play. The key is to free your mind of anything else that isn’t turning you on. Stay in the moment and focus on giving and receiving pleasure. If you find yourself drifting away, into a neverending thought loop, take some deep breaths and pull yourself back. Yes, it’s easier said than done but worth a try considering this can not only put you in the mood but heighten the whole experience.

Acceptance and non-judgement

Mindfulness teaches you to let go of the pressure to perform or be perfect or even orgasm. In that moment, your and your partner's bodies are to be enjoyed. Sex is not a race, it’s a journey. There is no need to rush the experience, take your time and just enjoy yourself. However, mindful sex is not a quickie. So, ensure you have the time to lose yourself in the moment. Once you let go of your ego and detach your mind from the fear of being judged and criticised, you’ll be able to immerse yourself in a sexual experience like never before. 

Your senses take over

A lot of people think mindful sex is about tuning into multiple senses all at once. But that can be quite daunting. The way to make your senses work for you is by focusing on whichever is the easiest at the moment. If it’s touch, then tune into that. Speak to your partner about using props like feathers or ice cubes. Focus on your partner’s touch, their feelings gliding across your body and their soft kisses on your neck. Zone out and only focus on this one feeling. When you become extremely aware of their touch, hot becomes hotter!

Take yourself on a journey

Mindfulness doesn’t require two to tango. It also helps heighten pleasure when you’re getting busy with yourself. Being present at the moment and using your senses to guide you can help you get to know your body better. Not to mention, the more you understand what you find pleasurable, the more sexually confident you will be with your partner. It’s all about being mentally, physically and emotionally immersed in the present moment.