9 things you can to do to find your ‘the one’ on a dating app 

There’s a lot of talk about finding the one on dating apps. While some people have found success and even love, the journey isn’t always that straightforward. For every "happily ever after" story, there are plenty of others that end in ghosting, mismatched expectations, or just plain disappointment.

Sure, there’s no guarantee that your soulmate is swiping right at this very moment—but that doesn’t mean you’re doomed to a never-ending carousel of bad dates. With the right intention, you can definitely improve your chances of finding a meaningful connection.

So, if you're wondering how to stack the odds in your favour and get closer to meeting someone truly special, here are 8 things you can do to increase your chances of finding ‘the one’ on a dating app.

The very first step to finding something meaningful on a dating app is understanding what you truly want. You need to know exactly what you're looking for. What kind of person do you want to share your life with? Once you're clear on your intentions—whether that’s a serious relationship or just something more casual—you’ll be in a much better position to find a match that aligns with those goals.

Set boundaries

This might seem like an obvious point, but bear with us. When you're talking to someone on a dating app, it’s far too easy for people to overstep your boundaries or say things that make you uncomfortable—especially since you haven’t even met in person yet. It’s important to set boundaries early on, whether it’s about the type of conversation you’re comfortable having or the pace at which things progress. This helps you prioritise yourself and ensures you're protecting your emotional well-being.

Remember not to settle for less

When we say “don’t settle for less,” we mean don't rush into anything just because you're eager to make a connection. Don’t walk into a relationship with the first person who shows interest or the first match you come across. Dating apps can sometimes make us feel like we’re running out of options or time, but it’s important to be patient. The process will likely take longer than you expect, and there may be moments where you feel discouraged.

Just remember: don’t lose sight of your worth or settle for less than what you deserve. The right person will come when the time is right.

Remember, the process is a long one

One of the most common frustrations with dating apps is impatience. Many people dive in thinking they’ll find “the one” straight away, but that’s not how it works. If you’ve been on the app for a while, it can feel exhausting, especially when things don’t seem to move forward. However, it’s important to remember that finding a genuine connection is a process, and it can take time. Don’t let frustration push you to compromise on what you're truly looking for. Keep your standards high and stick to your goals.

Allow a connection to progress slowly

When you find someone you’re clicking with, it’s tempting to rush ahead and dive straight into deeper conversations or set expectations too quickly. But slow and steady really does win the race. Allow your connection to build naturally, and don’t rush things. This gives you the space to really get to know the other person, assess compatibility, and decide whether this could go somewhere long-term. It also lets you gauge the person’s intentions and how serious they are. There’s no need to force things—let them unfold at a comfortable pace.

Don’t stick to a ‘type’

Take responsibility for your own happiness

A common mistake many people make when dating online is relying too heavily on someone else to fulfil all their emotional needs. While it's great to connect with others, no one else can make you happy unless you’re content with who you are first. Cultivate your own happiness outside of dating apps—focus on your hobbies, friendships, and career. When you’re happy and fulfilled on your own, you’ll attract people who are looking for the same thing, making it much easier to form a balanced, healthy relationship.

DO NOT shy away from your intentions 

Honesty is key in any relationship, but it’s especially important when you’re dating online. If you’re not looking for anything serious, say so. If you are, make that clear. Being upfront about your intentions and what you’re looking for can save a lot of time and heartache later on. Similarly, be honest about your own life and experiences. The more authentic you are, the more likely you are to attract someone who genuinely aligns with you.

Don’t take rejection personally

Online dating can sometimes feel like a game of rejection, especially if you’ve been on the apps for a while. But remember, rejection is not a reflection of your worth. People are on dating apps for different reasons and at different stages of their lives. Someone not responding to your message or deciding they’re not a match isn’t a personal affront—it's just part of the process. Keep going, stay positive, and don’t let a few setbacks make you doubt yourself.

Lead image credit: Netflix 

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